My Election Take

The day after the election—this is the day difficult to imagine ever coming.  In the thick of the piercing attack ads, the tightening polls, and the wild prognostications, a clear-cut conclusion seems forever out of reach.  But time keeps ticking, Election Day comes, and the dust eventually settles.  Wiping away the dust after this election cycle revealed the re-election of President Obama in the middle of the worst economy since the Great Depression.  The Left is exuberant while the Right scratches its head.  And inevitably, with the beauty of hindsight, the analysis begins.

The election was decided by two essential factors—and neither one of them pertains directly to policy.  The first one is demographics; the second one is personality. From the Republican point of view, the latter is easily remedied but the former should be absolutely terrifying.  As no stone is left unturned by the thousands of pundits and experts that craft opinions of events as overwhelmingly analyzed as presidential elections, I’m not claiming that these two factors have not already been explored at length.  Nonetheless, these two jump out at me.

America is becoming more diverse.  There’s no sidestepping that fact.  The percentage of white people in America is fast declining.  Here’s a little “if A, then B” logic with serious demographic generalizations worked in: the Republican Party is the party of old white men and the Democratic Party is the party of the others (young people, minorities, single women).  If old people die off while America becomes less white, Democrats by default will increasingly receive a larger share of the vote into the future.  Period.  As long as age and race remain a good predictor of one’s vote (which is a sad reality), the Republican Party in its current form will be rendered obsolete.  The Republican Party has absolutely no choice but to expand its net—it has to appeal to, cater to, reach out to, whatever-you-want-to-call-it to minorities, single women, and young people, or risk going the way of the Whigs.  Fittingly, prominent voices on the Right are already softening their stance on illegal immigration or calling for outright amnesty.

The personality factor is an all-encompassing term I’m using to describe charisma, likeability, and personal story.  Mitt Romney fell flat on this.  Though the Romney campaign was successful in a late push to ameliorate the profoundly negative persona painted of him by the Obama campaign, the feeling that Romney was out of touch and weird was still entrenched.  The best barometer for this phenomenon in American history is my mom.  She has a near impeccable record of voting for the winning presidential candidate.  I’d call her the quintessential middle-of-the-road, average, persuadable nonpartisan American voter.  At the end of the day she simply votes for whom she feels cares the most and for whom she sees as the most normal and likeable person.  That’s it.  When she voiced dislike of Mitt Romney for being stiff, unlikeable, and awkward, I knew it was over.  This woman voted for Obama in 2012 and 2008, Bush in 2004 and 2000, Clinton in 1996 and 1992, and she thinks possibly for Bush Senior and Reagan both times (and possibly even Carter and Nixon).  She’s not hyper political so she has trouble recalling her voting record from previous decades, but you get the point.

Encouragingly for the Right, the personality factor is remedied much easier than the demographic one.  They can blame the vessel, the messenger, not the message (though no one is arguing the bizarre rape comments from some Republican senate candidates helped).  But Romney did much to shoot himself in the foot, primarily with the 47% comments.  A more at-ease, amiable candidate closer to resembling an average person would have had a great chance of beating Obama.  But either way, the Republican Party has some work to do.  It appears that some sort of civil war might ensue between the Tea Party/purist wing and moderate/establishment arm.  There’s the conundrum they face where one side says they lost because the candidate was not conservative enough, claiming that Democratic-light or RINO (Republicans in name only) candidates always lead to losses (McCain, Romney), while the other side sees a far right-wing agenda as being out of touch with main stream America and, therefore, guaranteeing  losses.

Martin Luther King Jr. said “the arc of the moral universe is long, but it bends towards justice.” That’s how I view this election.  That the hateful speech of the far right-wing was rejected, and that the Republicans were not able to get away with ignoring minorities, young people, and single women is proof of the above quotation.  The reality that a competition will ensue between both parties to appeal to the traditionally ignored segments of society benefits everyone and represents that bend towards justice in action.

Politics

Me So Horny

I’m serious about this question: why are humans so damn horny?  Alongside money, what else makes the world go ‘round?  Unarguably it would be sex.  Sex is everywhere.  You cannot watch TV or flip through a magazine without seeing images of people missing important articles of clothing.  Imagine the total dollar value of industries that thrive off of sexual arousal.  I’m talking lingerie, porn, prostitution, strip clubs, escort services, sex toys, sexy commercials, and drugs for impotence.  And let’s throw in things where sexual attraction is implied: jewelry, hair regrowth products, fancy cars, fashionable clothing, workout routines, weight-loss substances, and advice column magazines.  We’re doubtless at billions upon billions of dollars.  And what keeps all of this afloat?  You guessed it: the human libido.

Now I understand that, as animals, humans must have a certain level of sexual desire and attraction to the opposite sex for reproduction and furthering the species’ existence.  But I think it’s safe to say that humans are charged with a little more sexual desire than what is necessary for that.  Like… a lot more! Why? It doesn’t make sense.  The pain and suffering caused by humans’ hyperactive sex drive is immeasurable.  It’s made bright and gifted men—men who have made the world a better place through their core convictions, drive for justice, and disciplined approach to leadership—act like 15-year-old boys and do the absolute stupidest things in the sexual department.  The examples are infinite: Kings, Popes, and leaders of old, to modern examples like Martin Luther King Jr., Bill Clinton, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Tiger Woods, and less public examples of women teachers with young boys.  It’s part of the human experience.

From a religious angle this makes even less sense.  The major world religions are terrified of sex.  Some Islamic cultures can’t bear to see the female figure at all.  Anything visible more than some eyeballs is sacrilegious.  Sex before marriage is blasphemy.  Catholic Priests must be celibate.  Hell, making out with a little too much tongue is sinning.  This is part of the pushback against what no one is above: humans are horny as hell.  But from the religious perspective, why would our creator create us with an over-the-top, overblown sex drive that is far more than what is required for nature?  Just to mess with us? That doesn’t seem right.

This all sounds kind of funny but it’s really not.  Let’s look at the really ugly side of this, where the darkness of that primal, visceral sexual urge bursts through its containment and destroys lives, families, and institutions.  It’s quite disgusting.  How does this list make you feel: young boys getting raped by coaches in the shower; soldiers raping women on the battle field; a mom with a beautiful family getting caught cheating with her boss; college girls getting raped at frat parties; young women being forced into sexual slavery; child pornography; women with seven different kids by seven different men; Catholic priests raping altar boys; and people getting slipped date rape drugs so that they’re nothing more than lifeless bodies with genitals to exploit?  This kind of stuff is the result of humans being infused with so much perverted sexual desire that it overcomes better judgment and rationality.

The self-righteous have the simple conviction that this whole thing is part of the human experience of good versus evil.  People need to control their desires and be the masters of themselves.  I agree with that, but that’s not the point I’m getting at.  I’m talking about why this much sexual desire exists in the first place.  It’s so past the level needed for reproduction it’s not even funny.  And ironically, some of the staunchest, do-no-evil, self-righteous bible thumpers have been the ones revealed to be into the most perverted, sexually deviant things.  Does Ted Haggard ring a bell?  Being that I am not God, not the one pulling the levers or setting up these amusing experiments, I have no answers.

Rants, Uncategorized

Everybody’s Got One

So, it’s that old presidential election season again.  And boy is it in full swing right now.  Mitt Romney pounded out President Obama in the first debate; Obama outmaneuvered Romney in the second debate; the polls have tightened; friends you thought were apolitical are now Rush Limbaugh and Ed Shultz on Facebook; and negative ads are blowing up TV screens across your nearest swing state.  It’s insane.  The opposing sides both honestly believe they are obviously correct.  So obvious, in fact, that they see the other side as nonsensical and laughable, or to put it in a less politically correct way: absolutely retarded.  I wrote about this exact thing with the rift between John McCain and Barack Obama supporters in 2008 (“Level Headedness”).  It’s pretty apparent things don’t change much.  But thinking about this situation made me realize something about which I find myself in a paradox: I enjoy topics that are open for interpretation, but then struggle with the reality that one side cannot win.

I see myself as a fairly objective person capable of seeing both sides of an issue.  I also consider myself intelligent, well-read, and reflective.  When I research something, read up on it, and reflect on it at great length, I feel as though my opinion is solid, respectable, and correct.  I feel like I’ve arrived at the position of common sense, the position that informed people would arrive at as well.  But then here’s the kicker: another person just as “intelligent, well-read, and reflective” as me, who’s researched, read, and reflected at the same length about the exact same issue, can arrive at the polar opposite conclusion.  This is especially true in politics, and really gets pulled to the surface during presidential elections.  It’s hard to wrap my brain around.

Religion and politics are two arguments you cannot win.  At the end of the day you’re dealing in opinion.  It’s almost like trying to convince someone that red is better than blue or that the fall is better than the spring.  Good luck with that.  Let me know when you convince someone to change her favorite color or season.  In concert with that observation, for the sake of mental tranquility, I’d almost be tempted to leave this inquiry at that: it’s just opinion, everybody’s got one.  But politics is different.  Unlike colors or seasons or even religion (as you pretty much just choose one), certain elements of politics play out in real life and are tangible and testable, primarily on the fiscal and monetary side.  Lowering and raising taxes, interest rates, and government spending have real consequences for the economy that can be tracked with empirical studies.  But somehow these topics remain primarily opinion.

For instance, brilliant economists can be diametrically opposed as to the best way to grow the economy.  Some on the right believe lowering  taxes on corporations and the wealthy is the best way to grow the economy (trickle-down economics), while some on the left believe in a progressively steeper tax structure, with an expanded safety net, to grow the economy from the middle out.  But isn’t there only one reality?  What do the numbers show?  That’s the problem.  Each side can produce its own numbers, focus on the agreeable stats, and, in a sense, create its own reality.  That is what I have a hard time dealing with.  This example is from within the intelligentsia, from the academia that eats, sleeps, and breathes this stuff.  And they’re on opposite sides of reality? What does this mean for the average Joe and Jane trying to decipher the mess?  It doesn’t bode well for consensus.

To add to the annoyance of it all, head to head competition—elections (the people speaking)—doesn’t solve anything.  Unlike with other competitions in say, war or sports, where when one side wins, the debate is over, in politics, if anything, the grudge match intensifies.  The loser becomes more defiant, digs in its heels further, and looks for ways to discredit the victory of the nemesis.  In sports you’ll find the same gloating and boasting pre-championship, but when the final buzzer sounds, that’s it, it’s over.  The losing team says, “Hey, they got us; they beat us.”  And that’s the end of it.  When a country loses a war it waves the white flag and says, “Ok, we surrender; you win.”  Not so in politics.  If Obama wins, do you think Rush Limbaugh will congratulate him and say Liberalism won?  Yeah right! If Romney wins, do you think Ed Shultz will congratulate him and say Conservatism is the better political option?  You know the answer.

I love the saying that opinions are like assholes, everybody’s got one.  I enjoy the political back and forth, the campaign wars, the tactical punches and counterpunches, and the opposing talking points.  I enjoy defending the positions that make the most sense to me and trying to come up with counterarguments to the counterarguments against my arguments.  At the same time, I have to accept that the struggle is the end.  There is no “winner.”

Politics

Don’t Ask Why

I’d describe myself as intellectually curious. I recently heard someone describe himself as having an unquenchable curiosity. I like that. I’d say that’s me. I’m addicted to information. I can’t get enough of it. I always want to know why people do what they do, why things turn out the way they do, and how everything works. The problem you encounter, however, is that more questions seem to be generated than answers. And as you dig deeper, the answers gravitate toward mere speculation or guesswork. Instead of an educational, brainy prescription for an elevated level of academic exploration, I offer a different solution: screw it, don’t ask why. Just don’t care about some things. It’s so liberating.

There really are just no answers to some questions. Intellectually curious people, however, want to hypothesize and theorize and dig for an answer. They have trouble letting things not make sense to them. Things they honestly can’t empathize with or relate to drives them nuts. I’m primarily talking about human behavior. Humans are weird and sometimes flat unexplainable. Why Tiger Woods was whipping his junk out with ugly girls in Perkins’ parking lots is not rationally explainable. James Holmes, a bright kid in medical school, busting into a movie theater and open firing on helpless moviegoers is not explainable. There are, of course, attempts to “get inside their heads” and apply the latest, fanciest philosophical and psychological principles in an attempt to produce plausible answers.

That’s where I say timeout. People are crazy. I’m so happy to leave it at that, save myself the trouble. A good portion of the Tiger Woodses and James Holmeses don’t even know why they themselves did it, let alone someone else figuring it out for them. I think searching for a motive is sometimes way overrated: it can be either so buried and obscure that you cannot ascertain anything meaningful from the entire exercise, or it can be so obvious that you’re basically dealing with a ten-year-old’s level of intellect. James Holmes did it because he was angry. Tiger Woods did it because he was horny. Who knows? Who cares? Set yourself free, don’t waste time asking why.

Uncategorized

The Inevitable Past

Everything that has happened started somewhere.  Everyone’s current position in life is the result of decisions, random occurrences, chance encounters, and experiences breeding experiences.  Each pivotal point, from trivial daily experiences to significant life-changing events, redirects your life’s path in some way.  It’s like shooting a ball into a pinball machine, the ball being your life and the obstacles being the pivotal points that change your direction.  This observation is a no-brainer.  If someone is alive and trying, something has to happen to them.  It’s impossible to avoid experiences.  But what keeps me in a constant state of imaginative anticipation is the simple reality that you don’t know the significance of something as it’s happening.  People are married. People are in prison.  People have kids.  People win the lottery.  People die at young ages.  People are divorced.  People set world records.  People make new life-long friends.  People create new profitable businesses.  Most of these can be traced back to the very point in time that the subsequent life-defining event began.  You can locate the instant that sent the ball rolling toward that seemingly inevitable final result.

All married people met somewhere.  Everyone was alive the instant before they died.  Everyone was free before they were arrested.  Every lottery ticket was just the next one until it was a winner.  That’s what makes life so crazy.  You don’t know for sure what will happen ten seconds into the future, or where exactly that big break or new life partner will come from.  But if one of these things happens it starts somewhere.  And that’s what I like to have fun with: looking at current experiences as though they’re hindsight.  It works because most things have an air of inevitability after they come to fruition.  Of course they were going to be your parents.  Of course America was going to win the Revolution. Of course Brad Pitt was going to be famous. These are such things we don’t even think about.  They seem obvious and in-line with the flow of history.  But they’re not.  Not at the time they weren’t.  Your parents easily could not have met.  America at times was all but defeated by the British.  Brad Pitt was born in Shawnee, Oklahoma to a high school counselor and a truck company owner.

In real-time, who knows when a girl will meet her future husband or when or if a singer will get a hit song?  Nobody does.  But it can happen at any instant.  That’s what makes looking at life through an inevitable hindsight lens fun.  Every girl you meet could be your future wife.  Meet a girl, shake her hand and get her name… future wife? That could be construed as psychotic, but guess what? Every married couple met somewhere.  And when they met, little did they know the ball was fast rolling toward their inevitable marriage.  All the anxiety of the first date, the never-ending waiting period for a call back, the timidity of the first physical intimacy—all obvious in the end.  They liked each other, duh!  Every time you’re out in society you can run into her—anytime.  Every time you play a set at a dive bar could be the show that makes you famous.  All singers were given a chance by someone.  That night she was in the audience and witnessed the most beautiful thing she’s ever heard.  It could be a woman who is well connected and points the spotlight towards you.  You never know.  You never know when or if that life-changing moment will occur.  That’s what makes life worth living.

Philosophy

Political Fantasies

Not many people, despite how laudable it is, support Communism as a realistic and workable economic system.  It’s not that they necessarily disagree with the idea and essence of Communism.  I bet a decent percentage of people would favor a true and complete equality of resources if it could be honestly achieved.  The problem is just that, it cannot be achieved.  It’s not realistic.  If you try to distribute resources evenly, everybody will end up worse off.  Karl Marx’s vision that people, even if knowingly receiving equal resources, would obtain a higher sense of consciousness, one in which everyone would contribute equally and not want to take more than his fair share, is a delusion.  It runs counter to human nature at the most fundamental level.  Inefficiencies would abound; people would cheat and look for shortcuts; people would get lazy and dependent, knowing they’re going to get what they’re going to get.   Conservatives love to use that reality as a way to bash the whole idea of income redistribution – progressive taxes, entitlement programs, welfare, government spending on education, healthcare, and infrastructure, etc. Ironically, when examining the way the Right believes the world should work, they espouse logic from the exact same economic fantasy they discount.

Mitt Romney was recently recorded saying that 47% of the population is dependent on the government, considers themselves victims, and cannot be convinced to take personal responsibility and care for their lives.  His reasoning, which is standard conservative boilerplate, is that the way to get people out of poverty and grow the economy is to slash government spending and have nearly unfettered regulation and taxes for the top income earners and “job creators” in order to grow the whole pie and allow more people to enter the middle and upper classes.  To people on the right, this statement is gospel and a big “duh!” But it’s not that simple.  First of all, opportunity is not free.  Most people were not born with silver spoons in their mouths or can simply borrow money from their parents.  Eliminating programs that provide a boost for the less fortunate would stymie a lot of future dreams and opportunities.  But more to the point, this idea that everyone can be in the middle class or rich is just as delusional as the idea that everyone can have a perfectly equal slice of the pie.

I see the double standard when the Right and Left make their cases.  Communism, or the idea of an equal share of resources, has been debunked.  Even the most liberal of people does not go around proclaiming that we need to pool all of the money and redistribute it evenly across society.  On the other side, however, especially in Tea Party or Libertarian circles, the near complete eradication of government is championed as an almost acceptable and rational solution.  The idea that everyone can be a millionaire is part of the common dialogue in conservative lingo—not even challenged.  But that statement is open to the same analysis and falls just as flat.  Wouldn’t that be ideal?  Having a country where the unemployment rate is zero and everybody is rich.  If you just reduce taxes and get rid of government, high-paying jobs will magically start appearing and people will move straight from the streets into the office.  How does this relate to the Communist utopia?  It’s just as unrealistic.

Having no social programs and an infinitesimal tax rate on top earners would be great for a small minority of lucky and highly skilled people—great for plutocrats.  It would also obliterate the middle class and quadruple the poverty rate.  It would be the incarnation of the have and have-not society.  Of course, this can be defended by stating that there will be winners and losers in this laissez-faire style capitalistic system, but that’s a different conversation about fairness and the government’s role in society.  Nonetheless, the Right promotes this far-fetched fantasy.  And what’s baffling is that their large Deep South constituency—much of whom is dirt poor—also supports this ideological fantasy.  That’s like a rich person, who’s worked hard for what she’s achieved, supporting the pooling of all her resources into a communal bank.  The real answer is in the middle.  You cannot have a prosperous society by pooling resources and dividing them equally among everyone.  You also cannot have a prosperous society by eliminating the entire social safety net and having everyone fend for themselves.  If you disagree, you live in a fantasy world, my friend.

Politics

2012 Just Got Real

Mitt Romney recently selected Paul Ryan as his running mate in the 2012 Presidential election—and I’m so glad.  Both sides of the political spectrum are applauding the move.  Conservatives love it because Ryan is a true conservative, takes a stand on tough issues, and communicates them clearly and forcefully.  Liberals are delighted because they see Ryan as a radical right-winger who will scare off independents and moderates with his infamous budget proposal.  But the reason I love the pick is because it shifts the paradigm of the election.  Where it was going to be a referendum on Obama’s first year in office—he’s terrible so choose me—it’s now going to be a choice between two fundamentally different visions of how the country should be governed.

The intellectual atmosphere of the election could potentially be elevated.  Don’t get me wrong, the mudslinging will continue and it will get nasty, but with that will come honest policy debate.  People who haven’t closed their minds and dug in their heels can stand to learn a lot.  The role of government in society is ultimately what politics is at its core.  We will get to see this play out live on the stage.  Each side is putting in all their chips and believes they are right.  Each side believes they can convince the American people that their vision is the path to prosperity.  Neither side is backing down.  I’m excited to learn a lot.  I don’t act like I have it all figured out like your standard ideologue.  I’m ready to hear the arguments, follow the logic, listen to the anecdotes, and continue forming my political opinions.  This election has the potential to be a great educational tool, one that provides a stark contrast and really makes you question why you believe what you believe.

Politics

The Jinx Trap

I used to try to avoid getting jinxed all the time.  Outside of avoiding being that guy, avoiding being jinxed was atop my list of life goals.  And if you live like that, you will be jinxed—all the time.  But I made a conscious decision: I stopped believing in Karma, jinxing, coincidence, all that.  What is going to happen is going to happen, period.  This world is chaos.  Wherever it came from and whoever started it just hit play.  We’re physical bodies bouncing off of each other.  If I tell someone I will run a certain time in a race, or that a first date went splendidly, or that I think I landed the job, but all turns out to be untrue, the failed result is not tied to the disclosure that I thought I would succeeded beforehand.  I don’t care now.  If I’m going for a sub-40 minute 10K run, I’ll tell everyone.  If I think the interviewer will hire me, I’ll say so.  If, after a first date, the girl seems like she’s from my dreams, I’ll tell people.  Maybe she won’t even return my next text and I’ll never see her again, but guess what, I’m not tying that to the fact I told my mom I met my dream girl.  I refuse to do that.

I see a good sports analogy.  In any association of sports, there is a plethora of teams competing to win the title.  All of them say positive things and believe they will win.  One team saying the entire season they will win the championship, will win the championship.  Others saying the exact same thing will bomb, and a few will come up just a tad short.  It’s not jinxing.  What will happen will happen.  If I’ve made ten free throws in a row and I acknowledge it before shooting my 11th, and miss my 11th– I missed my 11th, that’s it.  Whether I acknowledged I’d made ten prior free throws or predicted I would make my 11th before shooting it is irrelevant.  On my 11th free throw, I dribbled the ball three times, spun it in my left hand, lined it up, and shot it the same way as the previous ten. That action is independent of what I said before shooting it, or especially independent of what some announcers said before shooting it.

Same with Karma, phuleeze! First of all, it’s impossible to quantify.  You’re dealing with infinite actions and occurrences.  And unless it’s selectively applied, just a couple of observations debunk the whole concept.  Some people live amazingly benevolent, charitable lives, staying clear of all things harmful to their bodies, yet experience terrible atrocities, random acts of violence, unusual diseases, and death at early ages.  Conversely, some dreadful people who are complete assholes, abuse their bodies, and cause suffering to everyone around them, live long, healthy lives and die rich in their 90s or 100s.  Explain that.  Is Karma suspended in those situations?

The real guiding principle of life is that IT IS NOT FAIR.  That’s it, my friend.  Life is not fair.  It explains everything.  Why did he get the job when I know I’m brighter? Why did she get cancer at 29? Why did my son die in a car accident at 17? How did he get away with that murder?  How did that guy beat me in a race when I trained way harder?  Life’s not fair.  There’s your answer.  I’m not going to float through life walking on egg shells, believing I have to put out the correct vibe.  I’m not going to keep secret my aspirations and doubts or blame anything if I come up short.  I’m just a person in this world trying to make it like everyone else.  If I step up and put my best foot forward, what is going to happen is going to happen.

My Life, Philosophy

That Guy

The goal of my life is not to be “that guy.” No, the core values of my life, the very essence of my being, the light I’m trying to reach at the end of the tunnel—is not to be that guy.  I hate those people. You know them.  The ones going slow in the left lane; the ones showing up at a restaurant five minutes before it closes; the ones loudly talking on the phone in the middle of a quiet library; the ones remaining motionless as the stoplight turns green; the ones introducing themselves to you again upon the ninth time of meeting you; the ones talking about themselves for 30 minutes without asking you a single question; the ones one-upping every story you tell; the ones returning every steak they order because it’s not cooked perfectly; the ones gung ho about plans for days or weeks in advance and then canceling an hour before the event is supposed to go down…

I could keep going.  I think you get the idea.  I DO NOT want to be that person.  So what’s the big deal you might ask. Then don’t be that person, right? True, I agree.  But a problem enters, and I’m ashamed to admit this: I have at times been that person.  But here’s the thing: I DIDN’T KNOW IT; I didn’t do it on purpose.  That’s what irks me more than anything in my entire life.  There is nothing worse in the world (and I mean this) than wholeheartedly placing every fiber of your being into the grandest achievement in life—not being “that person”—but then being that person.  Let me share an experience that illustrates my point.

This story involves closing time at a popular coffee shop.  Long story short, I was sitting in the shop on my laptop, sipping coffee and studying without a care in the world… after they were closed!  Yep, that was me—that guy.  You should have seen the look on my face when one of the employees interrupted the jam fest in my ear buds to notify me that they had been closed for 15 minutes.  I was in shock!  How could the arbiter, the forefather, the gospel writer of The Code of Not being That Guy, be that guy?!  Here’s how.  I’d been frequenting this coffee shop for some time.  I knew the closing time was 11 pm.  I had seen it on their door.  But it had been a couple months since I had been.  Apparently 11 pm was their summer closing time.  It was now fall/winter.  Their winter closing time is 10 pm.  There you have it.  I knew damn well exactly when they closed, but I had the wrong time.  It was still hard to digest the reality that to those employees, that very night in that coffee shop, I was that guy.  Perception is reality.  To make matters worse, I had a difficult time convincing the rude closing time notification messenger that it was a mix-up.  Whatever.

I will continue on the greatest quest a person can undertake: the avoidance of being that guy.  A few unforeseen speed bumps will not deter me.  I know you cannot miss something you’ve never had, but you should thank me now.  Whenever you’re sitting at a red light, you will not have that guy in front of you; whenever you mess up my order, you’re serving not that guy; whenever you cut me off in traffic, you’ll be greeted by not that guy.  Basically, whenever you’re around me, you’ll have the absence of that guy in your presence.  You’re Welcome.

Lighthearted, My Life

That’s Satisfying

Can you only be satisfied after being unsatisfied? Can you only feel the euphoria of satisfying a need or desire if you’ve been experiencing the strain of that need or desire?  For the basic needs of the human animal, the answer to these questions is an undeniable yes.  It’s only refreshing to chug water if you were first dying of thirst.  It’s only appetizing to devour pizza if you were first starving.  It’s only relieving to use a toilet—if you were about to pee your pants.  Pretty obvious stuff there.  Drinking or eating when you’re already stuffed or saturated does not add to your satisfaction, and will more likely reduce it.  The thing I wanted to ponder was how far this extends.  What else in life—whether more universal or self-important—makes people happy? Is the happiness or fulfillment achieved in a certain realm only possible if there was first the absence of that satisfaction? The possibilities of this inquiry are infinite.  They can range from substantial life-achievement type accomplishments (marriage, wealth, career) to small victories (finding a perfectly fitting pair of pants).  But do the same principles apply? Or do they only apply to basic human needs?

It gets more complex when pondering these questions beyond the basic human needs level.  For instance, can you only treasure money if you were previously poor? There’s not as direct of a correlation.  I think at this point you have to get more general.  Or you have to separate between a need and a want.  With money, you don’t have to be rich to be happy, that is, as long as you can pay your bills.  I still think it is possible to make the general statement that people who achieved wealth from modest beginnings are more likely appreciate and accrue satisfaction from material things than people who’ve known the lavish lifestyle from birth.  But again, that’s speculation and would probably have to be judged on an individual by individual basis.  I just noticed, right in the middle of writing this, that what I’m essentially doing is going up Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs.  His famous pyramid is below:

Do you have to lack the things on the pyramid to appreciate and enjoy them? Incidentally, I already covered the bottom rungs and came to the conclusion that those things are only satisfying if that desire is in full swing first.  That’s what gets interesting when you ascend the pyramid.  Is love/belonging or self-esteem and respect only gratifying if you first weren’t loved or respected?  I don’t believe so.  Can you be loved too much, to where it’s unappealing?  Can you be respected by others too much, to where you actually wished you weren’t as highly regarded?  Again, I don’t think so.  The top of the pyramid gets too indirect and esoteric.  It doesn’t logically follow.  Only being able to enjoy morality, creativity, or lacking prejudice before not doing those things gets way too convoluted.

To return to my initial pondering from above—how far the “satisfaction only after the lack thereof” inquiry extends—the answer is: not that far.  It does primarily pertain to basic human needs for survival.  As you move up Maslow’s pyramid, it shifts towards enjoying the fulfillment for what it is and not because it assuages a vital absence.  Unless you’re part of a highly ambitious intelligentsia, with achieving wisdom as your life goal, you can’t really desperately lack the top of the pyramid in the first place, so when you achieve it, the experience is purely a positive addition to your quest for satisfaction; its absence doesn’t necessarily harm you.

Philosophy